Killing Lucas Read online

  Instead, the attacker headed straight at Lucas. Bracing himself, he prepared for the assault and wished he had more space move. Metal in the man’s hand glinted as a flash went off. Never taking his eyes off the knife, Lucas fisted his hands, prepared to jump the man first. But then he saw Kiloran break free from Hunter’s grasp.

  “No!” he yelled, pulling Kiloran close, cradling her against his chest as he turned to shield her from the attack. He tensed, certain he would next feel the slice of a blade in his back. It never came.

  Lucas turned, curious as to what or who had stopped the attack, only to find Tony on the ground with the man under him. Tony punched the guy once in the face before security came and pulled him off. Kiloran’s arms wrapped so tightly around Lucas she nearly took him to his knees. After a moment she pulled back, hands and fingers moving over him. “Did he hurt you?”

  “He never touched me, Tony got to him first.” Lucas looked down at his brother who had yet to get to his feet. “Nice tackle, Tony.”

  Tony nodded but other than that made no movement.

  “Tony?” Bile formed in Lucas’s throat. “Tony, get up.”

  Something was wrong. Hunter must have sensed it as well, as he kneeled beside his best friend. Hunter turned to the security at the door. “Get a fucking doctor out here now!”

  Lucas pushed Kiloran to the side, landing on his knees beside Tony. “Wait for us in the lobby, Kiloran, and someone get these damned people out of here.”

  He pulled Tony into his arms, supporting him against his body. Blood oozed from under Tony’s fingers. Hunter placed his hand over Tony’s to stop the seep of blood. “Damn it, we’re at a hospital. Where the hell are the doctors?”

  Lucas had once heard that time stood still when tragedy hit. He’d never believed it until now. Seconds crept by with agonizing slowness. Tony remained uncharacteristically quiet, and that worried Lucas more than the blood. Hunter yelled at Tony to stay awake in between screaming for the photographers to get the fuck away. The flashes continued to go off, but Lucas didn’t care. All he could focus on was his younger brother bleeding to death in his arms. He helplessly watched Tony’s color go from unhealthy green to terrifying white. And for the first time in his life, Lucas understood Tony. Really understood him. He promised his brother right then and there he would never balk at his worrying ever again and rambled on about how the family needed him, Haven needed him.

  The emergency-room staff showed up, in what he would later learn was only a couple minutes rather than the hours his brain made it out to be. Hunter, covered in Tony’s blood, and Lucas followed the gurney in a state of shock as far as they could.

  “Luc,” Tony said as they were reaching the surgery door, his voice hoarse and broken. “Call…Mom and Haven…don’t let…see…TV.”

  “Tony, stop worrying for once. We got this.” And then he was gone leaving them to stand staring at the door. Lucas only moved when Kiloran grabbed his hand.

  Hunter’s deep voice cut through his thoughts. “You need to sit down, both of you.”

  “I need to call my mother.”

  “I’ll call her and Haven. You two go find a place to wait,” Hunter said, heading to the nurse’s station.

  They were moved within by hospital security minutes to a waiting area on the third floor, where a hospital rep came to assure them the press was at bay and apologized, clearly terrified of a lawsuit. Agent Vassar arrived next with a few agents. He asked a few questions, but since most of the incident had been filmed, he didn’t need much of a statement at the moment. He explained that the police were still in the process of identifying the man who attacked them. Once that had been established the FBI could step in and get some answers.

  Lucas leaned over, his elbows on his knees, and looked up. “Is he the one?”

  “Looks that way.”

  Kiloran should have been celebrating. It looked like the man behind all her terror had been caught, but she wasn’t. She looked as pale as Tony had. Lucas grabbed her hand and squeezed.

  “It wasn’t your fault, Kil. That guy was going to hurt someone today,” Hunter said as he came into the room in a hospital green scrub top. His shirt had been ruined by Tony’s blood.

  “Hunter’s right,” Vassar said gently before adding he would return after searching the man’s hotel room if he had any news.

  Spencer and Trenton arrived soon after Vassar’s departure. Trenton took Kiloran up to visit Nancy, both to get her out of the room and so Lucas could stop worrying about her.

  Lucas paced, Hunter sat statue still, and Spencer stood guard at the door.

  “Who called Haven?” Spencer asked to no one in particular

  “Hunter did.”

  “And Mom?”

  “I did as well,” Hunter said. “They’re leaving as soon as they can get to Tony’s and Haven could get Jocé out of school”

  “Should I look into a hotel for them?”

  “If you need something to do, by all means call hotels while they cut open our brother.” Lucas kicked a chair across the room, anger erupting. “Why the fuck would he do that? Why didn’t he just let me handle the guy?”

  “He’s Tony. Why does he do anything?” Spencer’s levelheaded voice cut through the red in Lucas’s vision.

  “I could have handled it.”

  “We know you could have, I think even Tony knew that. From what little I saw on TV and online, Tony didn’t make a move until your focus switched from the guy with the knife to Kiloran. At least that’s how it looked to me.” Spencer picked up the chair and placed it back on its feet.

  “So it is my fault. If I had just stayed with Hunter…”

  Lucas looked up and saw Kiloran standing in the doorway. There was no way to take back what he’d just said, and she wouldn’t have believed him anyway. And at that moment, Lucas wasn’t even sure what to believe. Frustration surged threw him anew as Lucas looked at the clock then the door before throwing himself into the nearest chair. “Where are the doctors?”

  “Working on Tony,” Trenton said but his usual wise-ass attitude was missing.

  Tears lingered behind her eyes, unwilling to fall. She didn’t have the right to come apart at this moment. She couldn’t take the focus off others. Lucas hadn’t said it, but Kiloran could tell he blamed her. And it was her fault, all of it. Had she done what was right all those years ago and never approached Lucas, none of this would have happened.

  Yet everything she had done to protect him had come apart at the seams as they’d walked into the hospital today. What had she been thinking, trying to reach for Lucas? Answer: she hadn’t been thinking. Instinct to protect the man she loved had overruled common sense and in a split second Tony had stepped in to protect Lucas’s back.

  Trenton had nearly had to pull her from the room to see Nancy. Kiloran didn’t want to see anyone. She wanted to comfort and support Lucas. “He needs me. I can’t leave him now,” she had demanded as Trenton grabbed her elbow and escorted her out of the room.

  Once in the hallway Trenton forced her to look at him. “Listen to me, Kiloran,” he had said, “Lucas needs a second to fall apart, get angry—hell, punch a wall—and he can’t do any of those things if you’re there. Do you think I want to be out here? But I know the best thing—no, the only thing—I can do is to give him the space he needs for a few minutes. You have a friend who is expecting you, and she doesn’t know anything about what just happened. For her sake visit and act like nothing else is out of the ordinary.”

  “You’re right.”

  “Of course I’m right.” Trent had flashed a smile. “I’m a Sherman. And I can tell you this: Tony is too damned stubborn to die. So don’t you worry about that.”

  Knowing two people lay in the same hospital because of Kiloran had made the visit with Nancy all the more painful. Nancy had been a
wake but not all that coherent; while the red welts on her face and hands didn’t seem as swollen, she was still on painkillers, which made her groggy. And although they had planned to discharge her the day before, Nancy had had a few episodes where her breathing had been labored, so the hospital staff hadn’t wanted to release her yet. So Kiloran and Trenton had sat with Nancy until she’d fallen asleep and the nurse had come in to tell them they to leave.

  Not that it mattered. Both Kiloran’s and Trenton’s thoughts were on Tony.

  Back in the private waiting room, she looked at the clock again. It had been close to three hours and still no news. Frustration built within her until she wanted to scream. She felt impotent and useless. Then everything erupted again as a flood of Shermans filled the room. Tony’s wife entered first with a visibly shaken daughter attached to her hip. She scanned the others in the room. Lucas’s parents and sister followed and for once the loud Sherman clan remained eerily silent.

  “Spencer, can you please take Jocé down to get ice cream or something?” Haven asked in a ragged voice. Haven was holding it together, but just barely. Her eyes were puffy but Kiloran doubted she had let a single tear fall in the presence of her daughter.

  “Of course. Come on, brat,” Spencer said keeping his voice light. He held out his hand, but Jocé ran to him and held on to his waist until he picked her up and carried her out.

  Joseph, the Sherman patriarch, stepped out of the crowd to pull Lucas in a tight embrace. Lucas clutched his father tight. Only when Lucas let go, did Joseph ask to the room. “What have the doctors said? Any news at all on how Tony’s doing?”

  “Nothing, we have heard nothing since they took him back.” Lucas’s anger erupted, causing the normally loud family to stare at him in silence. “Goddamn it. What the hell is taking them so long? It’s been hours.”

  “Calm down, son.” Joseph patted his son’s cheek. “Somebody get him some coffee. I’ll be right back.”

  Kiloran would have jumped at having something, anything, to do but Trenton was quicker, and was out the door before his father. She stayed out of the way in the corner, isolated and alone. Stepping back, Kiloran tried to make herself as small and unnoticeable as possible. Lucas’s family reminded her so much of her own. She hated the distance she’d created with her family to keep them safe. If only she’d had the same willpower when it had come to Lucas.

  Trenton returned with more cups of coffee than any one person should carry, all of which lay untouched on a side table. Funny how watching coffee cool seemed fascinating at the moment. Perhaps it was better than loneliness and isolation.

  Haven was the first to notice her and come over. “Are you okay, Kiloran? It’s not your fault,” she said, wrapping her arms about Kiloran.

  “It is my fault.”

  Michelle Sherman came over and held Kiloran’s hand in her warm one. “Hon, don’t you know there is nothing in this world that would have stopped Tony from protecting Lucas?”

  Big, wet tears now fell. Kiloran could have dealt with their anger, their hatred, even hostility, but not this understanding. This she had no defense for. “If it weren’t for me…”

  “Tony would have found another way to make a mess of things. Now wipe those tears.” Michelle reached into her purse for a tissue and dabbed away Kiloran’s tears. “Tony explained, before coming up here the other night, about what happened all those years ago. Only someone who truly loved my son more than herself would have done what you did.”

  Everyone fell quiet as Mr. Sherman came back in followed by the doctor. “Mrs. Sherman?” he addressed Haven. Haven trembled as she squeezed Kiloran’s hand until the blood stopped flowing. “He made it through surgery just fine and is in recovery. “

  Haven would have collapsed to the floor if Trenton hadn’t had the foresight to place a chair behind her. Loud sobs of relief racked Tony’s wife. Trenton wrapped his arms around her for support, whispering words of comfort Kiloran couldn’t hear.

  Lucas asked in a gruff voice, “What took so long?”

  “There was more damage than we expected. We’ll have to watch for the usual signs of infection, but he should make a full recovery. Once he is situated in his room, you can go sit with him, Mrs. Sherman. Everyone else will have to wait until the breathing tube is removed. I am hopeful that will only take a couple hours at most. Dr. Sherman, I assume you have more questions for me, so if you would like to step over to the desk I can answer them will I finish some paperwork.”

  “Kiloran, can I ask a favor?” Jacinda asked from behind her. Looking up, Kiloran saw Hunter standing behind his wife, holding a sleeping baby in his arms. Kiloran hadn’t even noticed her come in.

  “Of course. Anything.”

  “I want to get the children and some of the family, at least my mother, out of here and over to the hotel to get some rest. But we can’t sneak away with the press bombarding the door and staking out our cars.”

  “You want a diversion?”

  Jacinda looked a little ashamed to be asking. “I wouldn’t normally ask, but right now you’re the only one more newsworthy than Tony. And I really don’t think Jocé should be here. Haven needs to focus on her husband.”

  “J.C., you don’t have to ask. I would be happy to do it for you. Give me a few seconds to collect my thoughts and ask one of the staff to tell everyone I am going to come out and make a statement. I bet the surgeon will want to make a statement too. The two of us together should be diversion enough for you to evade them.”

  Sure enough a quick news conference was set up in no time. Kiloran fixed her makeup just enough to look pretty but not too much that she looked perfect. She knew how to play the press, and looking disheveled and forlorn would make the story juicier. While Jacinda and Spencer took the children down the back hall to a staff door, Hunter waited for the press to go en masse to set up their cameras to hear what the surgeon and Kiloran had to say. Hunter moved undetected to the car and drove away.

  When the press conference ended, Kiloran looked up at the hospital, unsure where she belonged. She was walking in when a reported stopped her. “Kiloran, what do you think about them charging the James Filch today with stalking you?”

  “What?”

  “You didn’t hear?” The reporter seemed to gloat. “They found his hotel room full of pictures of you and a shrine dedicated to you.”

  “Excuse me.” Kiloran rushed into the hospital, ignoring Lucas, who was waiting for her just inside, and ran to the nearest ladies’ room. Empting the contents of her stomach, she was sick until all she could do was dry heave. She jumped when a cold, wet paper towel touch the back of her neck.

  “It’s over,” Lucas said, backing out of the stall so she could exit.

  Kiloran didn’t know what to say, so she just nodded. She walked over to the sink to wash out her mouth.

  “They got him. It’s him; they’re sure of it.”

  She felt so numb. She had spent so many years afraid, looking over her shoulder, wondering if one of the men staring at her was the same villain haunting her and now she had a face to go with the terror. Lucas handed over her phone. “Your director has been calling every two minutes since the news broke.”

  “I can imagine. Probably expects me back on set first thing tomorrow morning.”

  “Actually, I told him you had to go to the police station tomorrow, so he opted for the following day in the makeup chair at four a.m.”

  “The show must go on.”

  They stood in the sterile seventies-era powder-pink-tiled bathroom. And although there were only a few feet between them it felt more like miles. A chasm forcing them apart. The few things that had kept them together were gone. Now what was left?

  “Trenton wants to drive us back to the house.”

  “You’re coming back?” Hope filled her for the briefest of moments.

/>   “I’m not doing anyone any good here and I need to get my things. I’ll check into a hotel room here in town until Tony can come home.”

  “Of course.”

  Lucas looked out into nothing, but didn’t move, didn’t say anything else.

  “Lucas?”

  He looked up at her. “I can’t do this right now. I don’t know how to do this. Now that they have your stalker and with everything going on I just—God, I just don’t know anymore. I have to be here for Tony now.”

  “I understand.”

  “I just need time.”

  “Time for what?”

  Lucas stayed quiet for so long Kiloran wasn’t certain he had heard the question, but there in his eyes was his answer. He needed to time to get over her. Taking a deep breath she smiled, or at least she felt her lips curl into a semblance of a smile. “This is the end, isn’t it?”

  “I don’t know. So much has happened, So many things I thought I knew…I’m not the same man I was all those years ago, Kiloran. I can’t give you what you need any more.”

  “All I ever needed was you.”

  “But you don’t know this me. Hell, I don’t know this me.”

  She nodded. During their first break up the press had blamed her for the split, but she’d at least known Lucas was safe. Now she wondered how she would pick up the pieces. Her heart was breaking with every word he uttered.

  “We can make joint statement from our respective PR agents saying we have tried and failed to fix our relationship. Of course my PR agent is lying in a bed upstairs…” Lucas clenched his fists in frustration. “It should have been me, not him. Why would he do that?”

  Kiloran knew the question was hypothetical and although she could say a hundred things, none of them seemed to matter. Lucas paced the small room as if trying to get his thoughts together.